Ok, here's my cranky old lady complaint of the day. Glaceau has been working overtime promoting their new line of low calorie Vitaminwater, called Vitaminwater 10. It's actually pretty good stuff, and since regular Vitaminwater has an average of 150 calories per bottle, you can get the Vitaminwater feel without drinking up your daily caloric intake. But, this is my problem with their whole campaign and brand label. Yes, they do make it clear that Vitaminwater 10 has only 10 calories per serving. But do you know how many servings are in a bottle? 2.5. Who drinks a third of their drink?? Yes, I know 25 calories is still little, my point of contention isn't that. It's just, I wish companies were a bit more realistic in their servings estimate, instead of breaking things down like that and misleading people. And yeah, a serving size is usually 1 cup which is how they get that breakdown to begin with, but honestly, a serving size should be the entire bottle. GRR.
But I will say this, the new low calorie Snapple juice drinks, in particular the Kiwi Pear, are AWESOME. And it's only 20 calories, and Snapple gets bonus points for not proclaiming that anywhere on the bottle or as a major selling point in campaigns to entice consumers. Thumbs up, Snapple.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Vitaminwater 10
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Katherine Heigl needs to go, stat.
News broke yesterday that Katherine Heigl and T.R. Knight might possibly probably leave Grey's Anatomy. I don't really care about that because I don't watch Grey's anymore. But, I care about this because I just want to say, GOOD GOD, JUST LEAVE ALREADY! Jesus Christ. I have never seen anyone in Hollywood whine as much as Katherine Heigl has. Holy shiznitz, lady. I know, I've talked about this before. And I swear, this is the last time I'll talk about it. But it really pisses me off that all she's been doing, since she has been in the spotlight, is complain, complain, complain, and butt in where she doesn't belong. Everytime an actor has a personal life that is full of drama, I can't help but think, has no acting coach ever taught them to be a blank slate? It's hard enough to take on a character and have people be absorbed in your portrayal of said character, but doesn't that become much harder when people know you so well from your life outside of acting? All this whining and complaining and talking has gotten on my nerves, and I think Katherine needs to drop off the face of the earth now.
Case in point. Grey's has been dogged by drama off the screen, which frankly, has been more entertaining than the drama that unfolds onscreen. With the whole Isaiahgate, she opened her big fat mouth to comment on the situation. I get that T.R. is her friend, but honey, keep out of business that is not yours! Then, she took her name off the Emmy ballots last year citing that her storylines on the show were not worthy enough for a nomination. It could've been a noble act, cause she did technically free up a slot for another deserving actress. Except coming from a whiny beeyatch, it was condescending. Not to mention, a huge kick in the ass for the writers of the show, who seem to be retaliating this season by giving her a dumb hooking-up-with-the-ghost-of-her-dead-boyfriend storyline. But honestly, I cannot stand hearing about her antics anymore. Way to bite the hand that feeds you; she does realize no one would know who she is without her stint on Grey's, right? Just checking. For some reason beyond me, she has made a decent movie career for herself (I do admit, I LOVE 27 Dresses...). But seriously, STFU!! You are loud, and it makes you ugly. And stop smoking so much, you chimney.
A part of me kinda hopes that ABC doesn't let her out of her contract, so that she's stuck where she so doesn't want to be, but a part of me also hopes they write her character off in a slow, painful death, preferably one where there is no way in hell she can make a sudden reapperance in any way in any future season. A beheading, perhaps? Am I being too mean? I DON'T CARE. Get off my beloved TV screen, Heigl.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Letter of the Day
We are nearing the end of 2008 and you don't have an official town website. Seriously? I understand that you negligently underfund the school system in order to keep property taxes low and to continue the myriad of shady businesses you have going on, but this is just ridiculous. Are you still attempting to cling to the golden age of file cabinets and fliers? 7000 Asians in this town and you can't get one of them to make you a website? Dammit Pal Park, I heart you so, but you continue to find new ways to frustrate me.
Angrily Yours,
Jorge J
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Most Useless Phrase/Mini-Rant of the Day: "No Offense!"
THE most useless phrase in the English language, in my opinion, is "No offense." (see also: "Don't take this the wrong way, but...") Really? Cause when you have to preface whatever you're about to say with that, you really do mean 'Yes offense." Some examples: "No offense, but your boyfriend is not cute." Huh. So, I really shouldn't feel bad that I'm with someone who is not up to your physical standards? Sure. "No offense, but your blog is boring." Hmm. Thanks for the constructive feedback, buddy! It's nice to know you appreciate my hard work.
Am I being too sensitive? Yeah, maybe. But the thing is, it's just not a nice thing to say. And like I said, totally useless, as the phrase is just a thinly veiled excuse for you to be rude. You can be more tactful when disagreeing with someone's opinion of something. Yes, I would like for you to tell me when I'm being a complete a-hole or something important like that. No, you don't really need to tell your girlfriend her favorite pair of shoes are fugly. Sometimes it's ok to not share your opinion, as valuable as it is. So... let's be a more tactful, sensitive-to-others type of people and retire that phrase from our everyday vernacular. No offense, but I think you're an insensitive idiot when you keep using that phrase. Wait, are you mad that I think you're an idiot? But I said no offense!!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Douchebag of the Day: Brooke Hogan
"I think it's kind of crazy that a woman is running because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I'm so moody all the time, I know I couldn't be able to run a country, because I would be crying one day and yelling at people the next day, you know?"My crappy photoshopping aside, nice, Brooke Hogan. Thank you so much for setting women back a million years. You just took one glance at the dream of equality and blew it to smithereens with that statement. I'm so glad you're on my TV screen, week after week, so that little girls can too dream of one day living off daddy's money while pursuing a mediocre, talentless pop career on the side. Just because the hardest decision you have to make all day revolves around what bikini to wear to the beach doesn't mean that all women are incapable of doing things that actually matter in the world. Brooke does NOT know best; you are an idiot, and congratulations- douchebag of the day.
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Top Chef: WOW.
Dear Producers of Top Chef,
Congratulations! You've succeeded in crushing my soul yet again. I was so certain that Lisa would finally get sent away to pack her knives .. but then those words were directed to Antonia instead. WTF. I mean, at least come out and admit that Lisa is hanging by a hair due to the angry reaction by Top Chef viewers, 'cause any attention is good attention by tv standards, right??
There are a few things that I've noticed in Top Chef. First off, irony is a vital ingredient to the show. If a contestant is shown in a TH saying how happy they are to be there, they will most definitely get kicked out. Also, if the other chefs are seen criticizing Lisa's many mistakes in menu choice, she will most definitely be in the bottom two .. but MIRACULOUSLY BE SAVED.
I would have to say that after the total kick in the face (seeing Lisa now moving on as one of the Top 3 chefs!), hearing Lisa bitch at Richard and Stephanie for not congratulating her for making it to the Top 3 was a spit in the face. I swear, hearing those words come out of her ugly dirty pirate hooker face really made me realize that the producers are ruthless, and will do anything for ratings. 'Cause holy shit, I was cursing my poor tv out like a mofo.
And yet again, now I am forced to endure another painful week, 'cause I HAVE TO watch the episode when Lisa gets kicked off. I plan to throw an impromptu celebration, cursing the day she was born.
Besides, I really plan on finding out which restaurant she works at so I can personally go and punch her in the effing neck. Seriously, you may have made it to the Top 3, Lisa, but I believe my fists have a fateful meeting with your tree stump-like neck in the near future.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
People I Hate: Top Chef Edition
I'm not really one for reality shows, but the one show that I HAVE TO SEE is Bravo's Top Chef. I've never really watched any of the past seasons as religiously as I have for the current one .. but damn, they've got me good with this one.
Anyway, so the premise of this reality competition show is to have chefs from around the country to compete for a prize of $100,000 to start up a restaurant of their own (along with an editorial feature in Food & Wine Magazine, an appearance at the Food & Wine Classic in Aspen, Colorado, and a culinary tour of the French Alps). Seems pretty much like Food Network's Next Food Network Star .. but yowsa, DRAMA-RAMA!
So last night's episode just pretty much exemplified how much I absolutely abhor Season 4 contestant Lisa. Augh, she's such a mofo. I really don't understand why she's still on (well, probably because she causes so much conflict with others and the fact that people are probably dying to see her get kicked off so they could laugh victoriously). But yeah, whether or not Andrew got kicked off last night because of her last minute attempt to salvage herself by ratting him out, it showed what sort of dirty pirate whore she really is.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
An Open Letter to Miley Cyrus
Dear Miley,
Hi there. I just want to start off this letter by saying that you're like so cool. Well, to millions of prepubescent little girls and boys, you are the bomb. Do people even use that phrase anymore? The bomb? Anyways. Though I think you're cute and marginally talented, I never really understood your appeal, except that Hannah Montana is an enjoyable enough of a show, and I have rocked out to your uber catchy See You Again a many times in my room.
But I digress. I don't really have a like/dislike opinion of you. I mean, I think it's awesome that you're a millionaire. I thought it was pretty impressive that your concert film managed to become #1 at the Box Office in February, beating out other major, more heavily promoted blockbusters. It's pretty cool that your dad is Billy Ray 'Achy-Breaky Heart' Cyrus, and that both he and your mom seem to care about you, giving you a weekly allowance and grounding you when you deserve it. And, you gave a shoutout to Jesus when you won big at the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards last month, which is cool cause He's my homeboy too.
But for all this talk about you wanting to be a good girl and a positive role model, there sure are a lot of suggestive photos of you, taken with your friends, floating around the internetz. I for one really don't care, because that's what 15 year olds do. But if you thought those photos would be the worst criticism you'd get, you were wrong. Who could have predicted the hot hot controversy your Annie Leibovitz-shot Vanity Fair photoshoot would cause, particularly in the one photo where you appear naked, covered by a sheet (but you were dressed underneath, you swear!!). That's all fine and dandy, because they were "artistic," and hell, it's Ms. Leibovitz we're talking about. If she asked you to roll around in a pig pen covered in pig feces, you'd do it, because it's her.
What's not cool? Agreeing to take the pics because you were 'so honored and thrilled to work with Annie' and then taking it back and blaming the raciness on her and the magazine once the media got wind of it. Nuh uh, girlfriend, oh no you didn't. You did not just diss the greatest living American photographer. If you had a problem with the shot, you/your parents/your teacher/your grandmother/whoever else was at the photo shoot could've stopped it. There's none of this ' a situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines,' which is Disney's official claim on the whole situation. Right, because Disney doesn't know a thing about manipulating 15 year olds to sell anything. It's plain and simple; you and your people were fine with the concept of the photos before the backlash. Backtracking is a bitch, Miley, and I wouldn't go there if I were you.
In all fairness, you probably didn't realize how much the media was going to blow this up, and you felt the need to do some damage control as a result. But seriously, you should know better at this point, as you yourself keep reiterating, you are a role model to millions of kids. Your very livelihood depends on those millions of kids and parents who watch your show, listen to your records, and buy all your merchandise. I want you to be a normal 15 year old kid, and take silly pictures with your friends, and go through your teenage rebellion stage. But sadly, you're not a normal 15 year old kid. You traded that in for your fame and fans, remember? Unfortunately, you can't get the best of both worlds.
This whole situation is unfortunate for you, Annie, Vanity Fair, and your fans. But you can't keep making mistakes (I know, I know, you're not perfect) and then apologizing later for it. That act gets real old, real fast. You may be the world's biggest star today, but keep doing that and you're going to be 'that girl who used to play Hannah Montana' tomorrow. Next time, just really think about what you do and say, before you do and say, ok? Millions of people are listening to and watching your every move, whether you like it or not. I know it's not fair, but that's the price you pay for getting to be the star you are.
Oh and one more thing. Don't mess with Annie, k? Thanks.
Friday, February 29, 2008
I lost to THESE guys?
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Korean Ahjummas SUCK.
Ahjumma is a Korean word for someone who is older and married. Some of them are harmless, nice even, but a lot of them are huge pain in the asses. My mom and technically your mom (if you're Korean, I guess) are ahjummas, but my mom's not rude and abrasive and thinks she's entitled to everything. I'm just saying.
I had a very rude encounter with a Korean ahjumma at a parking lot last night, and it just reaffirmed why I steer clear of them in the first place. I'm backing out of my spot, and I notice that there are two cars waiting patiently for me to do so. I'm so busy making sure that I don't hit those cars that I completely don't even notice there's another car backing up diagonally from me. So of course, I hit it. But considering I was literally backing out at the speed of 1 mph, I knew I didn't do any damage to the other car. If anything the car probably ruined mine, as it was this huge SUV. Anyways, so I get out of the car and instead of inspecting my own, I go straight to hers to assess damages. Of course there were none, but I wait as the lady literally looks at her bumper for 3 minutes. She doesn't look at mine, she doesn't say anything to me, she's just staring at the non-existent dent in her car. Rudeness, check.
And then she opens her mouth, and spits out, 'Why would you back out at the same time as me??' Wow. Abrasiveness, check. Ok, so she's right, to a point. I mean yes I did back out at the same time as her. But I didn't do it on purpose. She wasn't in my line of sight. And if she saw that I was backing out and obviously NOT stopping, why didn't she wait? Sense of false entitlement, check.
Then she wordlessly got back in her car without further acknowledging me at all, leaving me standing there. WTF??? So I got back in my car and cursed her all the way home. In my defense, I just want to say that I am a good driver. And contrary to popular belief, I don't usually do stupid things like this. Not since my first car, anyway. But Korean ahjummas?? Driving in Palisades Park and on Broad Avenue?? They're like little bubbles of accidents waiting to burst and unleash disasters on good drivers. GRRRRRRR.
